A recent YouTube comment got me thinking. After showing the small shower stash owned by the boyfriend in my ‘Bathroom Tour’ video, an inquisitive viewer asked if he takes on my often spouted beauty advice. A small snort was exerted when I read this comment as he is in fact the most least interested male that walks on this earth when it concerns the cosmetics world. In fact, he makes a face much like the one pictured whenever I mentioned the ‘m’ word. Oh, aside when it comes to bath salts, he loves bath salts and happily throws half a tub into each of his baths and always ends up getting caught out in the process, hence the other picture above. But his day to day routine consists of a dab of body cream being slathered on his face each morning, along with a splash of aftershave and he’s out the door leaving me shaking my head in bemusement and swapping the body cream for its face formulated counterpart in his absence.

Since moving in together he’s been exposed to all sorts; the face masks that wouldn’t look out of place in a scary movie, the 30 minute evening skincare routine and bedtime beauty ritual and even facial hair removal (and he’s yet to pack his bags and leave – score). The cumulation of these events, plus the endless trudging round department stores and numerous Space NK’s has made for some very entertaining quips on his part. So I thought I’d flip to the other side of the coin today and with his consent, here’s a rundown of the boys best beauty related observations…

After a trip to the Diptyque store, “Diptyque confuses me, I never know where to start reading the words on the bottles.”

“A moisturiser, is a moisturiser Anna”, the response after questioning his use of a body cream on his face.

On seeing the results of a botched beauty counter makeup that left me with Aunt Sally-esque cheeks, “You look very…….flushed?”

“MAC is my favourite makeup shop, it looks like a sweet shop.”

“Blotchy, blotchy balm?” His answer for what the BB in BB cream stands for.

I’m sure my observations on cars and beer brewing would inject the same chortling response in the male population as these quotes (hopefully) have had on you. I’ll leave you with one of my personal favourites, “Your hair looks very nice today, it’s very flat”. There are no words. 

  • Cherie Ho

    Oh my goodness Anna the quotes are hilarious! Love this little peek into the personal side of VDM. :) xx

  • http://rothaariges.blogspot.de/ Flora

    Great post!

  • Zoe Zoella

    THAT IS HILARIOUSSSSSSSSS!! ANNA, MARRY THAT GUYS. HE IS SO FUNNY:).
    misszoeblog.blogspot.com

  • http://cosmeticdebris.blogspot.co.uk/ Becky

    This really brightened my morning (although my 3 year old looked borderline scared when I started guffawing at the computer screen)! My boyfriend’s generally clueless when it comes to all things beauty related but he can’t get enough of my Origins Ginger Souffle and Lush lip scrub x Becky

  • andulac

    oh boys.. you have to love them :)

  • KLG_Hair

    Very funny, great post!
    I get similar observations when it comes to hair.’What do you think of this (show picture of a hair up)It reminds me of cakes, cakes on her head, in a good way….’Different species. x 

  • Charlichatters

    this is so sweeettt!!

  • Chelsey Westby

    Haha, loved this post. Sounds exactly like my boyfriend, when applying blusher one morning he turned to me and said “What does that even do?” – as if he couldn’t even see the evidence on my face! Although he is a lover of my moisturisers and lip balms which I catch him using on regular occasions.

    chelseyxlou.blogspot.co.uk xo

  • http://www.sarah-rosegoes.blogspot.com/ Sarahrosegoes

    Hahah this is hilarious, I’m considering writing a book on what my boyfriend says about fashion as it’s hysterical. LOVE your blog!

  • Jess-grace

    A recent one of my boyfriend after I asked if he liked my make up that day - 
    “Yes.. it looks very.. shiny?” Not the word I was looking for!! xx

  • Glitzylife

    Oh dear, my friend insisted on flat ironing my hair and taming my truely wild texas cow lick. I didnt have the heart to tell i her i alwalys let it have its way.

  • http://www.abouthappybooks.com/ Sabrina @ About Happy Books

    Thanks for making me laugh! The last comment is by far the best. :)

  • Jodie Moores

    ahh, this made me laugh! It just shows how much girls really love makeup when the males just don’t have a clue! 

    http://jodie-melissa.blogspot.co.uk/

    xx

  • Madeleine Childs

    Ah hahaha this mader giggle a lot whilst waiting in a room full of journalist!!! BRILLANT more please! X

  • http://thislovegame.blogspot.com Diane

    That boy is a keeper, Anna xx

  • Freckles

    Brilliant! My boy is partial to some Burt’s Bees cuticle butter…on his smackers! I used to giggle at his mistake… But I think he’s on to a winner! Lip licking lemony goodness! Perhaps I should let him loose to roam the rest of my stashes for alternative uses…

    frecklesandbeauty.blogspot.co.uk

  • http://www.fitznbitz.com/ FitznBitz

    My 7 year old likes my hair “flat” too!! ;)

  • Amelia

    i smiled all the way through this :) cuuute 

  • Afroditi

    Haha…that was so funny!!My boyfriend cannot even use hand cream on his own, despite the fact that his hands are awful lately!

  • http://twitter.com/fuss_bucket JEM NOT JEMMY

    so. cute.

  • http://norwegianelephant.blogspot.com/ Romila Marie

    Haha, your boyfriend’s hilarious!

  • Adeline

    oh thanks for saying all this, I thought my boyfriend was the only one to moisturize his face with body lotion!! Also one day, he said, while watching me putting powder on my face with a brush : “why are you brushing your face for?” : )

    • http://ravesndramblings.blogspot.com/ WY H

      Haha that just made me lol in the office – oops! x

  • Sarah P

    aarrgghh!! My husband has complimented my hair before by telling me it looks ‘flat’…men tsk!!!!

  • http://ravesndramblings.blogspot.com/ WY H

    Oh I just love your boy, he’s hillarious. You are an amazing couple, I can just feel that haha! Please do keep the amazing quotes coming, please do! xo

    http://ravesndramblings.blogspot.com

  • emilyeclupton

    Absolutely hilarious!

  • -Ky-

    My boy used my face primer when he ran out of his face lotion. At least he got the “face” part correct. :-)

  • http://erstwhilefelicity.blogspot.co.uk/ Sonia

    Oh this made me laugh haha! Especially the last one! 

    http://erstwhilefelicity.blogspot.co.uk/

  • Gita Bončina

    Hahaha, this made me laugh :D. My boy is quite on the same side when it comes to make-up, especially on the moisturizers (a moisturizer is a moisturizer… ) :).

    xx
    http://gita-oddsandends.blogspot.com/

  • sarirah

    Haha, aww bless. This reminds me of what happens when I take one of my closest friends makeup shopping with me. :p

  • http://fragmentedsplendour.blogspot.com/ Annabel

    I have to remind mine to wash his face.. or he doesn’t… what’s that about? ergh & moisturiser?! he’s never heard of such mysterious thing! He also likes to time me in boots, gets out his phone as a stopwatch and tells me how long we’ve been and how his death might be any second… what a charmer. 
    I think you’re doing okay there Anna ;)
    xo

  • http://www.girl-with-makeup.blogspot.co.uk/ Emma

    This post genuinely made me laugh :) Boys will just never understand will they? I’ve once had face powder referred to as “face dust”. We still laugh about that one…

  • joysteib

    LOL!!!!!……….and to the words of Mr’ Wilson in the movie Dennis the Menace…”he’s only a boy”!!!!!  Such a sweet comical blog today!!! Thanks for sharing!!!!! <3

  • Georgia Crocker

    My boyfriend would think nothing of using body lotion on his face, he using body wash as a face wash and doesn’t understand why I think it’s so weird.  Bit of a strange question but would you ever go more into depth about facial hair removal,  you use where and how often ? x

  • sam

    Those quotes are amazing. Men don’t understand, especially about how all moisturizers are NOT made equally!

  • Primrose191

    This made me laugh so much!

    TherockyR.blogspot.com

  • Charlotte Mackie

    Haha, that’s brilliant :’)

  • BK19

    That last quote made me laugh out loud at work. Absolutely brilliant lol

  • LNLentz

    In your ‘Favorites of the week’ posts, you should include your favorite one-liner of his. Totally brightened up my Tuesday morning.

  • Bryn B

    Absolutely hilarious, made my afternoon :)

    beautybasicsxx.blogspot.com

  • Alex_Kay

    This was super entertaining! Love it

  • Maddy Cane

    So funny, laughing out loud reading these! xxx
    http://unstitchedd.blogspot.co.uk

  • Charlotte Kerr

    Ahh he sounds brilliant. Those quotes gave me a little chuckle while sitting at my desk :) x

    http://lottiekerr.blogspot.co.uk

  • http://www.gemmameansjewel.com/ Gemma Antonia

    Lol! I love his comments towards beauty related things! My boyfriend doesn’t even use a moisturiser, not even a body moisturiser on his face!! And nothing I do will get him to :/

    Gem xhttp://www.gemmameansjewel.com

  • http://twitter.com/jiillrobinson Jill Robinson

    Hahahaha. Brilliant stuff. At least he moisturises at all!

    alittlesoapbox.blogspot.com

  • ARachelsays

    LOL!!!  The last comment is indeed the BEST.  

  • gleepface

    I actually snorty laughed at the nice flat hair comment. Bit awkward as I’m sat on reception in a busy waiting room.Nice and flat. Nice. Flat. Boys are so silly.

    Mine refused to wear suncream on holiday, got burnt, refused to wear aftersun, and now refuses to exfoliate or moisturise now that he’s flaking everywhere!

    He always likes to comment on how silky I am right after a shower, and I repeatedly tell him to moisturise! I’ll get there one day…

    http://www.gleepface.com

  • casey23

    I can’t choose between the quotes but Diptyque one was hilarious :) And he is kind enough to tell you that you just looked….flushed!! He’s a keeper

  • LettieLoves B

    Fantastic. What a funny thing the male species are!
    http://whatlettieloves.blogspot.co.uk

  • http://notjessie.blogspot.com/ Jess

    lol Have to admit, I’m with him on Diptyque! lol I love the “flat” comment! Men are hilarious. 

  • Katie Hello

    Haha! My brother always steals my exfoliator whenever I leave it in the bathroom, so I have to hide it away somewhere.
    Katie xx
    http://thegravityandshe.blogspot.co.uk

  • Isangee Ramirez

    Hahaha, I loveeeddd this post! Hilarious:D

  • http://twitter.com/ChelseaWears Chelsea

    :D love it

  • Hanna

    your male is more tactful than mine. After an interesting Mac makeover, I got “you look like a teenage mutant ninja turtle”

    then a couple of days later..”you know you were complaining I was walking really fast after your makeover the other day? It’s because I didn’t want anyone to know we were together”

    …..there are no words

  • Marija

    My hubby is very similar to your boyfriend but he ‘enjoys’ with grimaces whenever I apply to his face my precious  liquid gold! He even notices the results while he thinks that it is actually liquid gold.. :)

  • Hanna

    Oh here is another…when I’m putting foundation on, “why are you icing your face?”

  • Laura

    I love the way you write. 

  • http://twitter.com/beauty_incrisis beautyincrisis

    hahaha reminds me so much of my fiancé Anna :-)))
    Although maybe mine is now better trained on some issues… shhh I hope he does not hear me :-Ρ

    Trying blue mascara, he said: “wow this blue stuff on your lashes makes you look like a strange little creature” lol ;-)

    I love this post!!!!!

    http://beautyincrisis.blogspot.gr/

  • Fionahodge

    My hubby is totally the same, he doesn’t get “beauty” at all, he thinks its a faff or clever marketing yet i have caught him a fair few times trying out my products and he does have a penchant for Lush bath bombs, although he’d swear blind he doesn’t!!!

    • http://twitter.com/flabbyface Julie Carter

      Mine has pinched a few of my bath bombs and sore blind i used them. Still a sore point and he refuses to back down and admit he used them although i could smell the blimmin’ things. Men! haha.

  • http://twitter.com/A_T_G_N_W_T Daniella

    Ha loved this! That bath salts pic is cute :) I think the worst I’ve heard from my boyfriend is ‘Did you put your make up on in the dark again, your face is all different colours?’ 
    Charming!
    Daniella x

    http://daniella-r.blogspot.co.yk

  • Julia

    this was hilarious!

    please do more post like that one! i love the way you write <3

  • http://twitter.com/LauGalve Laura

    My boyfriend is the opposite! he likes to ask me about skincare for him and tends to borrow my day moisturizer…x

  • http://mizzrubiiee.blogspot.com Rubiiee

    Haha, when it comes to skin and body care, the boy and me tend to share some items (how sad), everything else he is clueless about.

    <3 Rubiiee

  • KatHorrocksMUA

    Haha love the last one it’s my favourite too! My personal favourite from my boyfriend was (after I was testing out a new dewy finish foundation) “Your face looks very shiny today”

  • http://thenonbrit.blogspot.com/ Amelia

    “A moisturizer is a moisturizer, Anna”.  Oooohoho if he only knew!

  • Katie Fawcett

    Ha I love this!

    Katie xo
    http://sugarfixxbeauty.com

  • Amber Donkersley

    Aww, too cute! My boyfriend is learning fast, he didn’t used to care, but now he follows me round Space NK and Boots like ‘Oh this is that fancy mascara isn’t it?’ or ‘Hey, there’s that BB Cream you wanted!’ but if you bring it up in front of his friends, he’s like ‘I don’t know what this woman is babbling about.’ haha!

    Amber x
    http://www.inlovewithallthatglitters.blogspot.com

  • Hearts&Crosses

    Hahaha aww anna your boyfriend is adorable, you are far too cute

    A little bit Unique

    x

    Oh and I’m running a giveaway, if you want to pop over and have a nosey! Giveaway here

  • http://twitter.com/HayleyDollymix Hayley Dollymix

    Haha my boyfriend likes MAC too just because he says it looks all “orderly”. He pretends he doesnt take it in but I caught him watching  a Pixiwoo video over my shoulder yesterday, bless them x

  • jess

    loved this post really made me giggle :D
    http://www.thelilywhiteenglishrose.blogspot.com

  • http://twitter.com/hannahjsheahan Hannah

    Haha, he definitely has a point with Diptyque! My boyfriend is fond of manly moisturiser (Kiehl’s Facial Fuel is his favourite) and the odd face mask or nose strip when I can persuade him but he definitely hates even setting foot in Boots with me. xx

  • http://beckysmakeup.blogspot.com/ Becky

    Oh Anna this was hilarious! Sounds a bit like our house! :-) 

  • http://twitter.com/flabbyface Julie Carter

    My husband can’t understand how makeup can be so expensive. This was after he tagged along with me once when i bought something from MAC and then Laura Mercier. And we’ve been together for 13 years. Never has he been on a shopping trip for makeup with me before. I cannot be having a bored looking man hovering over me.
    He never comments on my beautifying. He just showers and sprays with B.O Buster. He collects Aftershaves for Christmas’ but never uses them unless i remind him of them of suggest he spritz something. 

  • Emma

    Hahaha best blog post ever lol….that’s so funny and sweet xx

  • Decisions Decisions

    Haha. My boyfriend is exactly the same. Although he is very patient when I walk around Space Nk and actually paid attention and bought me a Diptyque candle this Christmas! Amazing and a lovely surprise.

    http://decisi0nsdecisi0ns.blogspot.co.uk/

  • http://obbeauty.wordpress.com/ Olivia

    I love this post. My boyfriend is the exact same way-he doesn’t even wash his face! Thank god he is genetically inclined to have clear skin… Sometimes for fun I quiz him on makeup related facts and he’s surprised me in how much he seems to have soaked up after years of dating!

    obbeauty.com

    • Allie T.

      I’m not alone!! Haha… My boyfriend doesn’t even wash his face either! And the jerk has miraculous clear skin… So jealous! 

      Allie
      http://ordinaryallie.blogspot.ca

  • Irene

    Great post. My boyfriend is the same. He once ventured into the drugstore to buy facial moisturizer and came out with a nivea body cream.

  • Dosta Radnjanska

    Great post
    Enter my giveaway Birthday Month Giveaway {International}

  • Elle

    Oh, that made me chuckle! :) Especially the quotes! “Your hair looks very nice today, it’s very flat”. I cannot get over that!!! :D Bless you, you just made my day!
    Elle
    http://www.ellexbelle.blogspot.com

  • Ampersaand

    Boys, boys, boys! Hahaha! I hope it becomes a regular feature x

  • http://juliettesdressingtable.wordpress.com/ Juliette

    Amazing post Anna. The boy’s answers are so funny, I am still chuckling! “A moisturiser, is a moisturiser Anna”, priceless…

    http://juliettesdressingtable.wordpress.com

  • Danielle Barbeau

    HA! Loved this post. I found myself chuckling the entire way through as it had some serious reminders of exactly how my bf is when it comes to beauty. 

    My personal fave from the archives when pointing out the eyeshadow fallout on the tops of my cheeks “I like the sparkles you’ve put on your face today”…thanks. 

    elliesvanitytable.blogspot.co.uk

  • Allie T.

    Hahahaha *dead*
    Oh, boys <3
    The best is still "Your hair looks very nice today, it's very flat." 
    I also think I may have to agree with him on his view of MAC being like a sweet shop, especially considering how many products I bought there on my last haul (if you're curious, check out my blog)… 

    Allie
    http://ordinaryallie.blogspot.ca 

  • Noël Swain

    oh man, my boyfriend is the exact same. at least yours uses moisturizer! 

    http://www.noelwithdots.com

  • Noël Swain

    oh man, my boyfriend is the same way! at least yours uses moisturizer! 

    http://www.noelwithdots.com

  • Suzanne

    My boyfriend has more products then me and is always testing out my expensive products. He does have very problematic skin however, or at least that is what he tells me

  • http://www.stylecandi.blogspot.co.uk/ Hayley

    Actually LOL’ed!!! It all sounds very similar lol! … when the boyf spies me leading him to the beauty/makeup section of any department store, I get the look of death and he then buries himself in his iphone! …thinking about it, I don’t think he even uses a moisturiser lol!

    I do feel sorry for him tho, he has one tiny section of our bathroom while my toiletries are over spilling! lol

    Hayley xo
    http://stylecandi.blogspot.co.uk/

  • Emily

    Bahahaha Oh my the flat hair comment is my favorite.  I am completely giving up any sort of effort with my hair now that I know what men really like is flat hair.  Who knew!  I have clearly been going at this all wrong.

    -Emily

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Sarah-Scheibel/2208416 Sarah Scheibel

    My hubs uses body lotion on his face, too.  Is it that horrible to have another tube of lotion meant for the face around, lads?

  • katherine.parkes

    this was hilarious! bless him haha the quotes are great! x

    http://thebeautyvisual.blogspot.co.uk

  • Lipmunn Tang

    hahaha this made me giggle so much! awh bless him – i love this post and these quotes so much! hope this post comes up again. And and at least your boy uses moisturiser…

  • http://rebeccalately.blogspot.com/ Rebecca Lately

    Aww, haha!  I loved reading this, Anna.  I’m sure my husband has thought, if not said, those kinds of things, too.

    But, I’m with him on the Diptyque labels.  :P

  • Amani

    LMFAOOO your boyfriend is so funny seriously you must giggle each time he says something cuz I sure did while reading your post haha !!

  • Withita

    I love the comment about your hair hahahaha so funny!

  • http://twitter.com/Alouette_Jolly Ada

    Ha!  I like the way he thinks about these sorts of things!

  • Nicole U

    HAHAHAHAHA! This post honestly made me laugh so much!

  • Donna

    I love this! And can totally relate. The fact that he actually moisturises is progression enough I suppose… lol xx

  • http://www.viviannadoesmakeup.com/ Anna

    The winner of the best comment thread ever?!? Well it’s got to be this one! I don’t think I have ever laughed so hard having a read – you guys and your guys are HI-larious! 

    I’ve sat down with my boy and read them all. He now thinks he’s a hoot, so whenever he spouts out some more makeup musings, I’ll be sure to note them all down and see if I can churn out another instalment for you. Thanks again for all the comments. 

    • gleepface

      I forgot to tell you, I introduced my boyfriend to the idea of hair removal cream by accident, and he then proceeded to adopt it for use on his beard. And I mean beard, not stubble. It worked surprisingly well at just giving it a little trim, actually, so maybe he’s inovative rather than just silly?

    • Mandiikinz

      My man tells me he is “furious because when I hear deep throat the first thing I think of now is blush” lol

  • Valenik

    ahahah so funny…..I moved in with my boyfriend a few months ago and he has been exposed to all sorts as well …. ahahah at first he’s always like…I’m the man I don’t use that stuff….but I caught him using my dermalogica mask ( that time I was pretty upset cause it’s expensive LOL) my face scrub in the shower and my shampoo….and then he was like am I handsome or not??? …grrr 

  • http://trainca.se/ Claire

    Try starting a beauty website with two confused men. My favorite from our developer this week: “Why are girls always painting their nails like evil black or light blue with little tiny birds?”

    I blamed pinterest.

    Find & share beauty products with friends: http://trainca.se

  • Pippa Jones

    Mine is excatly the same. I was using the Bioderma last night on my face, and he said what is it, so I replied wit Mcillaire water. He replied with that very expensive french tap water then? Erm Yea okay then… Ohh come on! 

    Men…

  • Kristina Leigh

    Haha it’s funny how similar peoples lives can be. I’m all the way in California and my boyfriend is exactly the same…. No matter what product I try to sneak into his routine he finds a way around it. I have even tried coming at him with the occasional pre-soaked cotton ball in toner but even that is too much for him to handle. Luckily he has become accustom to my beauty rituals although he often must think I’m crazy to an extent with my drawers full of beauty items . A trip to sephora is likely to get a few eyerolls. 

  • trina

    hahaha this was awesome.

    my boy has given me a few laughs over the years aswell, best one for me:

    “i like that line u do on your eye (cat eye eyeliner), is that foundation?” 

    i can’t even….

  • boyswillbeboys

    I can totally relate. when my boyfriend watched me do my make up for the very first time, he saw me pencil in my eyebrows and was mortified!! “But why do you pluck them if you’re just going to draw new ones on?!” LOL they will never understand!

  • Kyungmin Bang

    Oh my god, this is one of the cutest posts I’ve ever read on your blog! Your boy is adorable haha ;) My boy loves to take baths and reading this made me want to get a lovely jar of bath salts for his b-day present :) Thank you so much for the post!

  • http://www.charlsramblings.blogspot.co.uk/ Charlotte

    Ahahaha love this post! Boys are so oblivious to it all aren’t they?! X

  • Fiona

    One day my bf told me “I like the colour of that eye blusher you’re wearing”…..

  • Sharon

    So funny…..your hair is flat today – priceless!!  Very good post Anna. :)

  • Oo

    you have an amazing sense of humour!!

  • Beauty Splash

    Love your sense of humour! Reminds me so much of my boyfriend, boys just don’t have a clue! Really great post, you and Mark seem like a really lovely couple :)